learning to let go
The house is a mess right now. Toys are littered across every room along with jewelry boxes, mail, dirty dishes stacked in the sink and baskets of laundry waited to be folded.
It's not a good feeling, especially when you are at home as much as I am.
When Jeremiah & I were first married we lived in this tiny, cute old house with white walls & a white kitchen, wood floors and two rooms along with a super small bathroom. We loved it. Since it was just the two of us and we didn't have much stuff the house was always spotless. I made sure that everything was put away each time we left and when we came home, the house smelled perfect.
Now in this house where we have Israel, more stuff, the jewelry business and a whole lot less time, I've had to learn to let some things go. Many days we leave the house not picked up because if we stayed to clean every time I doubt we could ever leave.
It bothers me. I feel unsuccessful and frustrated and like the mess of the house creeps into my thinking a bit and makes me feel even mentally messy.
That's not to say the house is never clean, it's clean at least once a day but that doesn't last long. I think what I've learned is that I need to find a way to be content with the way things are. Eventually we would like to have another child so it's not going to get easier any time soon!